and more stuff

Well I think I did a pretty solid job on my physic lab I turned in today and the grade on the one I got back was an A! needless to day I'm doing a lot better this time around....gah I still don't like physics, now I need to concentrate on the homework that is due Friday because I think I'm going to have a gig that night so I can't wait till the last minute on this one....like I usually do lol. Other than that todays been a pretty good day talk to Belle for a sec and then after the lab, which only took an hour, I got to drive a 2013 Chrysler 300 around :3 twas amazing....mostly because of all the stairs =P not that its a bad car, its just that it's not my fav.Welp I think the jew wants to go grab some beer and even tho I don't plan on buying any I don't mind tagging along and keeping people company =] ttyl guys.

Alrighty....

Man, went to bed "early" lol it was early for me. I only slept a few hours, had some really really weird dreams and I then jolted awake. As you guessed it I can't go back to sleep. I kind of wish Belle and I could hang out again as friends atleast, I miss talking and bull shitting with her. Welp hopefully I'll start getting tired again....hope this isn't a sign for things to come this week.

And another thing

Another reason Jasmine is awesome is because I'm pretty sure she's a christian..... again not saying she'll be my next girl or anything of that sort, but I really wouldn't mind if my next girlfriend was a christian....maybe that's what I've been doing wrong this whole time. I kind of want someone who understands that kind of faith, in something you can't see or touch but know is there........anyways that's been on my mind. I know I probably sound crazy and am about to thump everyone with a bible, but yeah, I'm not. So everyone just chill. Do you even lift bro?! Hehehe speaking of lifting I can curl the 50s now and I can do triceps extensions with the 65 pound dumbbells :) make'n so many gains! O and the shrugs with the 70 aren't as hard anymore....might have to bump it up to the 75s next time :3 sorry just kind of excited that working out is visibly paying off!! Well, till next time!

Wow

So....I just blew through that last post. Sorry for all the misspellings and horrible grammar hehehe not that I don't normally botch the English language, it just feels like I did an exceptional job at it in the last post. I wanted ol Jasmine to see it before she went to bed cuz shes pretty cool and all, that's why I rushed. Anywhoozle just felt the need to extend my apologies to yall. Side note....Belle just emailed me about some kind of diet drops...or something like that lol That bitch calling me fat?!! XD jk her email probably got hacked. Any ways night 

Take a number

Ok ok ok so about Belle, nice girl, but I have atlast come to the realization that hey you know what its over, if she doesn't want me any more......whatever. If we'll ever get back together....who knows. But there has been this one girl who has been my good friend for a long time, who peeks in on this little emotional roller coaster every once in a while. This women in question has brought to my attention the fact that hey, I have not once talked about her at length in one of my blogs soooo here we freak'n go!!! I guess I'll call her....idk belle 2 XD no no no thats fucked up uhhhhhh. Lets call her.... Jasmine yeah Jasmine. So Jasmine is this one girl whom I met through a friend over the internet. I've known her for...idk a while. Anyways beautiful beautiful girl, an engineer, lives far far away tho. First time I ever saw her the first thing I though was "holly cow...knock out" then I found out that she was a supper smart engineer major lady and I just had to keep reminding myself I needed to behave. So typically shes taken by some guy that doesn't at all appreciate her....like at all, appreciation level is a minimum. Sorry Jasmine but it is....hes kind of a douche. So yeah kind of had to write her off from the get go, because at the time 1 I was taken, 2 even though at the time I was in a long distance relationship, I was kind of weary about them and the distance was definitely way too much. and 3....well I was taken and I'm not that kind of a guy. So anyways yeah you guessed it I like her and even if sparks don't fly I would at least like to finally meet her face to face, say Howdy and do other southernerly things lol. Now here's the clincher were both about to be finished up with college, we'll both have money and maybe just maybe.....idk she might get a job closer to me....I might find something closer to her......or not and we'd probably just stay friends cuz shes a little crazy, I'm definitely crazy. I could see our crazies happening together in a platonic kind of way ...... just say'n Jasmine. Soooo anyways thats my little blog about Jasmine. Don't message me going omg I didn't know you thought I was cool cuz yeah. Wish I had a cool friend like you a little closer.   

London

                                                                Happy Valentine's Day
                                                                     Miss You, Belle

Supplemental

"Love" that one misunderstood word that constantly get us in trouble. Love isn't harts and roses and chocolates, its not fucking each other every night, its not a security blanket, love isn't gushy feelings and sweet things. Those things happen because of love, not because that is what love its. Love is caring about someone. Caring is worrying about there well being, physically taking care of someone, wanting to protect them in every aspect of there lives. So if Love = Caring = hardwork then Love=hardwork and people don't like hard work, because love is hard ass work. Love is a lot of patients with the other person and its kind. You don't envy, ya don't boast, and your not proud. When your in love you're not rude or self seeking. You don't fly of the handle at every little thing. You keep no records of wrongs and you tell the truth. You always protect, trust, and hope. Love always perseveres....because love never fails. I've heard it from different people, even my grand'ma, and they all say that in a relationship each side has to give 150%......why you ask? Because you're both human and sometimes you'll fall and the other person has to be able and ready to understand they need to pick up the slack until the other is back on there feet, That's what love is. Is this a rough patch? or is this really is the end....I don't know, all I know is I'll hold that 150 for as long as I can...for that Belle..

Long shot horse

(excuse me if this sounds really choppy. I was just letting thoughts flow)

Ok ok time out. Time to state some facts and call out some BS. Ok so this is the girl who was talking not only about rings and married stuff, but was talking about it with me after being the one who brought it up first. Secondly She is/was crazy about me, not to too my own horn. Well now both of her parents are Aggies and her dad is an ex marine, so I know she knows about loyalty. Distance ain’t nothing but a thing and I know she has the tools and the ability to get through this long distance. I know the first year of adjusting to College is hard especially if you have a significant other and especially if there not there with you. I would love to have her back and truth be told I’d take her back if she wanted to come back, but with that being said I can’t wait forever. Not that I’m on the hunt for someone new, but I can’t just wait around for her to love me when its convenient. My heart is not a hotel, it’s a home for someone’s live….thank you Brooks and Dunn. Anyways bottom line is that I, like a moron,  I still have hope. Call me a hopeless romantic, but I know for a fact that she’s a hopeless romantic lol sooo its time for her to put her boots on with her PJs and save me this time. I know all this hope could fall though I remember my first girlfriend I grew apart from and I am well aware of the old adage about how if I love her let her go, but I love her and I don’t want to let her go. I’m not fool tho I realize this could be it….god  I hope not tho….I still remember that moment when it clicked and I let my guard down and I actually let my heart love her…..I hope that wasn’t a mistake. Soooo anyways that’s my life at the moment, O and I have tests and all the normal school shit life crap aswell lol Welcome to the real world, jack ass.

Uh urrr uhhh keep it together

So that pretty girl, that is very dear to me, just told me some things and my first logical thought is that "Rustin, she needs to be happy that is your job and if this is going to make her happy let her go" Yeah sure ok ok that makes since. She is infact a human being and has feelings and emotions and stuff like that......but then theres that voice that I hate that is saying..." SHE IS FUCKING MINE, (reads about her talking about other guys) I WILL FUCKING BREAK THERE FACES AND RIP THERE SPINES OUT WITH MY BARE HANDS AND CHOKE THEM WITH IT!"  hehehe yeah sooo anyways if you can't tell she skyped me and said we should be no mas cuz of the long distance and she couldn't take it and she was crying which made it harder for me to not cry and then I did.......some....things when we finally hung up gah.....this blows. I really liked her. I have a feeling how this is going to play out.......and if it does ....idk what I'm going to do Gah.....